Mr John Clarke

Posts under news:

Mr Clarke and Mr Dawe will re-open for business at the end of January.

In 1975 the musically gifted Mr Dagg recorded the following seasonal message. ‘Be brief and effective’ he was told.

Anyone wishing to order items from the shop for xmas, should do so soon to ensure delivery.

We’re sure to have something in your size.

And in social news, here’s John with the estimable John Ruane, the director who made the movie ‘Death in Brunswick’. They were attending a screening of the film at the St Andrews Film Society.

John spoke, more or less as follows:

The movie contains a scene of great sensitivity, set in a graveyard. While we were filming it, the generator broke down and someone was sent to get another one. It was about 2 o'clock in the morning and we sat in pitch dark in the middle of the Brighton cemetery while we waited for a replacement. While we sat, talking away, it became obvious that some people who were normally very talkative said very little, and others who hadn’t said boo to a goose became very eloquent under cover of darkness. One of these was a boom operator who told one of the best jokes I’d ever heard.


A man went to the doctor to get his eyes tested.
‘Stand on that line’ said the doctor, ‘Put your left hand over your right eye and read me the top line on that chart on the wall.'
The man stood on the line, put his left hand over his left eye and began to concentrate on the chart.
'No, no’ said the doctor. ‘Put your LEFT hand over your RIGHT eye and just read me the top line.'
The man put his right hand over his left eye.
'No, no, hang on’ said the doctor and he got a small cardboard box, cut a hole where the man’s left eye would be and put the box over the man’s head.
‘Right’ said the doctor. ‘Now just read me the top line on that chart.'
After a moment the doctor heard sobbing from inside the box and stepped forward in some concern. 'Are you ok?’ he asked. ‘What’s the matter?’.
‘What I really wanted was a pair of those little round glasses like John Lennon’ explained the man.

St Andrews is a beautiful little town about 40km north east of Melbourne. Great loss of life and property occurred in this area in the terrible fires of February 7th 2009. A wind change saved much of the town but Strathewen was devastated and the nearby towns of Kinglake and Marysville were destroyed.

The Film Society is a thriving affair, fully equipped, well attended and astutely positioned directly opposite the pub and the excellent pizza restaurant. The Johns had a great night and were shamefully indulged.


John Ruane was given a bottle of wine. John Clarke was given a shovel.

Images by Lloyd Godman.

From time to time we will send out news on various appearances, products and sales (4 to 5 a year at the most).

Sign up below:

* indicates required
Email Format

The website has been redesigned to make it possible to include more projects and to make the layout easier for you to use and easier for us to upload more material. The ‘Projects’ section lists some of John’s work, from Fred Dagg in the 1970s to Clarke & Dawe this week and everything else in between. TV, film, radio, books, text, you name it. The ‘Tinkering’ section includes work which doesn’t fit anywhere else and we hope the descriptions help. You can purchase things in the Shop, Contact Us and link to our Facebook and YouTube and Twitter sites. If you get into trouble, raise one arm in the air and one of our lifeguards will swim out to you.